party is over, game is on, party never end

Only when u didnt overlook what you are responsible to do, there wont be a game u cannot win.

Association and Dissociation

Association makes you fully participate in the game. Disscociation makes you read the game well. Able to use them in the right time makes the difference.

I am having enough of Dissociation, I need to learn how to make friend with Association.

Winning 2009 is the theme. Peaceful in heart, get along well with fear, be motivated.

God Speed!

Change

There is always a reason for not updating Xanga. And the reason is happiness is more than sadness.

My passion to record or memorize will only heat up when sadness overwhelm happiness.

Sadness is something I missed in 2008 but she come to visit me again by this end of last year. Hopefully 2009 will be a year of balance plus a year of change.

In most of the areas, I am still a optimistician. That's what I force myself to be trained in the past 10years. Instead the basic charateristic I born from is still a pessemistician who seldom show up nowadays as I know how to control it in someways.

Being optimistic can support others to be more positive, cheerful and energetic.

Being pessemistic can support myself to run, to improve, to learn, to grow.

Angel and Devil have their own duty in this world. Please appreciate their participation, they make the world balance.

Work hard or give up

Being decisive or not makes a big difference in life. It is very painful to hold and wait, then why not go n work hard or simply give up. Decisive shows brave and positive personality.

Decisions keep us moving on, even go or don't go after the decision was made everything can go on until the next decision check point.

We avoid making decision because we are afraid of making a wrong decision or failure. What if I tell you, all your choice is wrong and will fail? Not to make any choice? Of course you can but in order to move on, we have to choose. Are failure or mistake that scary? I believe making friends with failure and mistake can make success as your lover. Failure and Success will support you to go forward and improve all life.

Usually we have friends more than lovers, don't we?

Why worry?

Why worry about my recovery? Becoz I love my job.

Why worry being disable? Becoz I love to fly.

Why worry about the world? Becoz I care.

Why worry about my future? Becoz I care how it goes.

Why worry about my life? Becoz I love to experience it.

Why worry about my babies? Becoz I love them.

Why worry about my love? Becoz I love you.

Why worry?

Becoz of LOVE and CARE.

想 Think Imagine

Thinking is a very interesting, there are no boundaries, no limits, no others. The dimension of human brain is as spacious as the space, amazing isn't it?

My 3rd day in bed begins today, do I really feel boring? not really actually.

I spend my time with my laptop, jp drama(Little Bee and Fortune Leave), movie The Illusionist, book POMPEII...

Pysically I didn't need much rest, coz I already have enough rest in my daily life. But mentally I am having a very good rest in the past few days. Since my tranformation, I fall in love with cultural stuffs, especially those related to humanity, psychology, socieology. But due to lack of space n time, which I need a lot to keep myself in mood, I am not working on it much lately.

In a ward of four, takes me 2 days to setup my own space to write something here. Sounds not very effective, let's see how I can improve in the future. But definitely I wanna have my own apartment before 2009.

To think about future, about improvement and about review are my favourites. I know I miss my job, my friends, my love. I worry about my illness though it is not that serious as I feel. In worst, what if I lost my right foot... what I can do after that, what happen to people around me. I worry about I wont be able to have a baby or I am not able to raise her. Will my love leave me? Am I not going to fly anymore? I wish I can fly with Erica on 13th, I swap in intentionally, dun wanna waste it? Will it become Tuesday with Chester? Still have lots of thing I wanna shall we others... Tons of thinking in my mind.

But what I have to do now, is to well use of my time and things around me to enhance myself. That's I only thing I can do, not just lying all day doing nothing. For the illness, I just save it for the doctor, nurse and god. Bless me!